Category: demisexual

Interview: Melissa Wilkinson

Today we’re joined by Melissa Wilkinson, who also goes by Art by Little Miss Luna. Melissa is a phenomenal visual artist who specializes in digital art. She frequently draws cutesy characters. For the most part, she has been drawing anime stuff for artist alleys but has recently branched out and done some drawings of plants. It’s clear she’s a talented and dedicated artist, as you’ll soon read. My thanks to her for taking the time to participate in this interview.

WORK

Please, tell us about
your art.

I’m an unabashed anime fan, so I tend to draw cutesy stuff.
I’m working on refining my style and branching out into other areas but I
always come back to cute because, ultimately, it’s what I like. I’ve learned I
don’t need to apologize for it. I’m a mostly digital artist but lately I’m
trying to learn watercolors!

What inspires you?

I draw a lot of fan art so I love taking inspiration from
cartoons, especially ones like “Steven Universe” that are mature beyond their
core audience. Outside of fiction I take a lot of my inspiration from food.
There’s so many colors and textures present in the edible!

What got you
interested in your field?  Have you
always wanted to be an artist?

I took a graphic design class in eighth grade and I’ve liked
digital art ever since. I gave up on it to study hospitality when I went to
college, but ultimately I came back to it and got a degree in graphic design,
too. I didn’t always want to be an artist but I was always interested in
creative things like cooking and writing.

Do you have any kind
of special or unique signature, symbol, or feature you include in your work
that you’d be willing to reveal?

I used to have a silly little symbol I’d stamp in the corner
of all my drawings of a heart with bat wings. Now I just have a logo I use on
my business cards.

What advice would you
give young aspiring artists?

The best advice I can give is when you’re working on
something and you’re starting to get frustrated, walk away. Take a break, take
a nap, breathe. You won’t produce any good work if you’re angry so come back to
it when you’re calm again. You can look at it with fresh eyes and try to figure
out what’s going wrong.

ASEXUALITY

Where on the spectrum
do you identify?

I used to identify as alloromantic but currently I’m going
by demisexual.

Have you encountered
any kind of ace prejudice or ignorance in your field?  If so, how do you handle it?

Not from other artists, no, but from my family, certainly.
Most of what I hear is that I’m confused or I just haven’t figured myself out
yet. Ultimately, I just have to accept that not everyone in my life is going to
understand me and that’s ok. It doesn’t really matter if they don’t get it so
long as I feel comfortable with who I am.

What’s the most
common misconception about asexuality that you’ve encountered?

That it’s just a phase and that the internet has poisoned my
mind and made me think I’m a “special snowflake.”

What advice would you
give to any asexual individuals out there who might be struggling with their
orientation?

Once, during Thanksgiving break from college, I was hanging
out with my friends from high school. They all started talking about their
sexual experience from their first semester in college and I felt so utterly
uncomfortable that I kept sneaking off into the bathroom, hoping that when I
got back they would have moved on to something else. Eventually I left and went
home and cried in my mother’s lap. I had no idea why I felt such a disconnect,
why I felt so lost. A year later I read about asexuality on Tumblr and I
realized that there was a word for why I was the way I was, and that there were
other people like me. The internet is your friend. You are not alone. Arm
yourself with knowledge and know that you are perfectly normal and there are
people who will support you. I’m one of them. Shoot me a message on any of my
social media accounts and I’ll be happy to talk things over! Ace artists have
to look out for one another.

Finally, where can
people find out more about your work?

Lately I’ve been mostly using my Instagram (at artbylittlemissluna)
but I also upload things to my DeviantArt (Little-Miss-Luna) and my
Facebook (at artbylittlemissluna)
and Twitter (at art_by_LML). I
also have an Etsy store (at artbylittlemissluna)
if you want to see the products I make and sell with my art!

Thank you, Melissa, for participating in this interview and this project. It’s very much appreciated.

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heyyyy, mod kai here! I’d like to tell you guys about a book I’m writing featuring autistic and asexual characters!

“Bring Me the Sky” on Tapas

“When I look up at the sky, it’s a bright red. I’ve always seen it that way. Everyone tells me they see the sky as blue. I’ve been told it looks like the ocean. I wonder why when I look up… I don’t see what everyone else does. I wonder if I’ll ever get to see the blue sky.”

Features: main character with autism that identifies as demisexual, main poc character (still working out identity)

there’s another comic I’m writing but I’m in the process of updating the cover so I’ll post that later!

(also, if you want to see more of my art like above follow me at @an-xi-ety on tumblr and dA!)

Interview: Sophie A Katz

Today we’re joined by Sophie A. Katz. Sophie is a phenomenal and versatile writer. She writes in a number of different forms and styles. She’s a fellow writer who enjoys writing hopeful stories (we need more of them! 🙂 ). It’s clear she’s a dedicated and passionate artist, as you’ll soon read. My thanks to her for taking the time to participate in this interview.

image

WORK

Please, tell us about
your art.

It’s all about stories for me – I LOVE stories, and
storytelling. So far, my best skill to bring stories to life has been writing.
I’ll write in pretty much any form; different stories need different mediums,
after all. Some stories are short, some are novels. Some are screenplays or
stage plays. I dabble in poetry. I have a few stories that sit in my head and
insist upon being graphic novels – I’ll have to find someone who’s better with
visual art to collaborate with for those.

What inspires you?

Life inspires me. That’s a vague answer. I have a “story
ideas” tag on my Tumblr with hundreds of pictures and prompts in it, and I
didn’t think that that was out of the ordinary until someone said to me, “Wow,
you get story ideas from EVERYTHING!” But everything DOES have a story to it.
You know that word “sonder”? About realizing that every other person in the
world is living a life just as complex and interesting as your own? I can’t
help but see that in everyone and everything around me. I don’t see things as
just the way they are – I want to know why, and what might happen next. And
that’s what a story is, at its base: why are things the way they are, and what
could happen next?

What got you
interested in your field?  Have you
always wanted to be an artist?

There was this dollhouse in my parents’ house – I think it’s
still in the basement – and incidentally we didn’t call it a “dollhouse”
because Mom did NOT want her daughters playing with dolls; we called it a
“people house,” like that Dr. Seuss book. I’d sit at the People House with all
of our toys, all the animals and action figures and Disney characters, and
narrate their adventures, for hours and hours. It was just what I did. Before I
could write or read, I told the stories of my toys. And then one day, Dad took
notes on the story I was telling, and typed it up for me. That’s where it
really started. After that, I learned to read and write, and started writing
little books, and Mom became my editor. But it took me until junior high to
really start identifying as a writer. Before that, I honestly thought I was
going to be an actress, even though I wasn’t very good at it, and didn’t really
enjoy it. I think because the storytelling thing was just something I’d always
done, I didn’t recognize it as special, or even as “art” at all – but it was
always there, and eventually I recognized it as such, and now it’s what I want
to do with the rest of my life.

Things REALLY took off once I realized that Disney World had
a writing internship…but if I start talking about THAT, then we’ll be here all
day.

Do you have any kind
of special or unique signature, symbol, or feature you include in your work
that you’d be willing to reveal?

That’s a really interesting question. When my big sister was
looking at colleges, I started picking up literary journals from the schools we
visited, and I started noticing a troubling pattern in the works published
there: they were overwhelmingly sad. I concluded then that sadness must be the
easiest emotion to evoke in a story, and the true challenge was to create
something that made people happy.

Bad things do happen in the stories I write, but they very
rarely end that way. Books and movies that end in hopelessness bother me. By
all means, kill your darlings and send me to bed crying, but give me a reason
to get up in the morning! This is a very roundabout way of answering that a
feature I include in my work is hope. My stories are most often about people looking
at the world and seeing not only the bad that is, but the good that could be,
and working to make that good come to be. I think a lot of people perceive hope
and optimism as naïve, and sadness and despair as true art. It’s fine to have
that opinion, but I don’t subscribe to it. I see art in joy, and in the
challenge of creating joy, and in taking on that challenge. I see art in hope.

What advice would you
give young aspiring artists?

You are not completely unique, and that is a good thing.
It’s a good thing because it means that you have something to offer that will
resonate with other people. You are not so different from the rest of the world
that nobody will ever understand; rather, you have something to create that
other people need. Create what is true to you, what is so true to you that it
feels like no one else in the world may have ever felt the way that you feel
about it. Create it and share it with the world. And someday, someone will walk
up to you, and nervously shake your hand, and say, “That’s exactly how I feel.
Thank you for turning it into art.”

Also, I highly recommend learning the skill of biting your
tongue and saying “thank you, I’ll consider it” to critique. It’s not an easy
skill to develop. Feedback is key to growth, and while you don’t have to TAKE
all the feedback anyone ever gives you (you won’t take most of it, and that’s
the way it should be!), it’s good to hear feedback. Feedback is how you learn
what people are getting out of your art, whether your art is doing what you
want it to do to the people you want it to do stuff to. I hope that sentence
makes sense. I’d appreciate feedback on that sentence.

ASEXUALITY

Where on the spectrum
do you identify?

Demisexual, usually. Recently I’ve been feeling a bit more
solidly ace; my body on occasion will send me a surprise bout of “nonononono”
even when I’m with someone I am very much emotionally connected to.

I don’t even know what’s up with my romantic orientation.
It’s like it plays “duck duck goose,” where it’ll go “duck duck duck…” over
everyone around me for ages and then suddenly “GOOSE! YOU HAVE A CRUSH!!!”

I like things to make sense, so it’s all a bit frustrating
for me, but I’m training myself to make peace with the uncertainty. Having
words like “demisexual” and “asexual” and “sex-positive” and “sex-repulsed” to
throw around helps some. I like having words for things.

Have you encountered
any kind of ace prejudice or ignorance in your field?  If so, how do you handle it?

Nothing’s been explicitly directed towards me, but romance
is such a prevalent part of the stories we tell that I can’t help but be
nervous. I’m nervous that I won’t be able to write a love story that someone
will want to read, because I can’t know what it’s like to be the allosexual
people that mainstream romances are about. I’m nervous that putting ace people
in my stories, or being frank about demisexuality, will bring more trouble down
on me than good. But this is my life, this is my truth, and these are the
stories that I wish, oh god do I wish, that I had had when I thought that I was
broken. How could I not write that? But I’m nervous, so how CAN I write that?

Fortunately, I found an incredibly supportive feminist arts
community at my university, and I felt safe enough there to read a piece about
figuring out my sexuality at an open mic. After the show, an audience member
came up to me and thanked me, because what I had read was exactly how it was
for them figuring out their sexuality. That’s when it hit me that however
nervous I was, I couldn’t let that get in the way of creating my art. People
need to know that they’re not alone. And coming up against ninety-nine readers
who think I’m some faker special snowflake is worth it if I can get to the
hundredth reader who needs to hear that they’re not alone.

What’s the most
common misconception about asexuality that you’ve encountered?

That it doesn’t exist.

What advice would you
give to any asexual individuals out there who might be struggling with their
orientation?

…Honestly, I wish someone had advice to give ME, because I
struggle with it plenty. What I do know to remind myself of as much as I can is
this: your sexuality does NOT make you a burden, and anyone who makes you feel
like it is can walk the plank.

Finally, where can
people find out more about your work?

I have an electronic portfolio at https://sophieakatz.wordpress.com/,
and I’ve just begun a writing Tumblr in an attempt to self-promote – you can
find that at https://sophieakatz.tumblr.com/.
Go ahead and send me a message there if you want to chat about anything! Or you
could contact me at http://ohthewhomanity.tumblr.com/;
that’s the blog where I use the “story ideas” tag.
You can also find my Odyssey articles every week at https://www.theodysseyonline.com/user/@sophiekatz.

Thank you, Sophie, for participating in this interview and this project. It’s very much appreciated.

Hey so how do I know if i'm actually Ace …

Hey so how do I know if i'm actually Ace or if I'm just Demi and haven't found the right person? Because I keep second guessing myself and I think I'm Ace but I really don't know because maybe I haven't met the right person?

As a chronic worrier, I get that this might be hard, but the best thing you can do right now is try not to dwell on it. A lot of demi folk identified as asexual before they found that person they felt something sexual for. And it’s totally fine to change labels if you feel that the old one no longer fits. However, you can’t predict the future so just live your life and if that person comes along for you, great! If not, that’s great too! You don’t need to feel sexual attraction to be a complete person.

Hello! Recently I've been thinking I am a…

Hello! Recently I've been thinking I am ace. I do not feel any physical attraction(or only slightly only after I get strongly emotionally attracted to someone.. Basically the only physical thing I feel towards my crush is the need to be close to them and touch them somehow) and that is the same with my sexual attraction, only way less. Like I want to have sex in the future but at the same time I don't? I want to know how it feels but at the same time i don't care.. What could I be? Love you💜♥

Sounds like you could be demisexual or grey asexual.

From our FAQ 

What is Demisexuality/romantic?
Lack of sexual/romantic attraction until an emotional bond has been formed

What is Grey/Gray asexuality/romantic?
Sometimes experiencing sexual/romantic attraction, but under specific circumstances, and/or not strongly enough to want to act upon it

Aspec & Arospec YouTube List Part 2!

asexual-society:

Apparently there are a lot more ace youtubers that I missed on the last list

The descriptions for each channel are pretty much just copied and pasted from their channel descriptions. Unless they didn’t have a description, in which case I just wrote ‘vlogger’.

Please note: All the content of the channels below may or may not reflect the views or opinions of this blog or it’s moderators. Nor is all of it safe for work or free of problematic elements. Please use your own discretion. 

Note 2: If your favorite youtuber is not on this list, feel free to add on! 

Enjoy!

soundsfakepod: Yes, we are still alive!! 

soundsfakepod:

Yes, we are still alive!! 

Sarah and Kayla talk about why the podcast is so late this week – because we’ve been working on our musical Bloom – a musical about asexuality!!!

If you’d like to catch the live stream of our musical or watch it afterward, check out our theatre group’s Facebook! facebook.com/nerdsdotheatre

For requests: I put the demise in demisexual

For requests: I put the demise in demisexual

lmao mood

buy me a coffee?

send my askbox calligraphy requests

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thatsaces:

When you’re reading some fanfic and there’s a random demisexual character

Everything you need to know about the term “de…

Everything you need to know about the term “demisexual”: undefined