Category: mod moyo

“You can’t be asexual and…”

necromouser:

lgbtqiapositivity: lgbtq muslims ????????? lgbtq christians ????????? lgbtq jews ????????? lgbtq hind…

lgbtqiapositivity:

lgbtq muslims ?????????

lgbtq christians ?????????

lgbtq jews ?????????

lgbtq hindus ?????????

lgbtq sikhs ?????????

lgbtq buddists ?????????

lgbtq shintoists ?????????

lgbtq who are religious ?????????

My own aceness is getting me so down and I feel like a terrible person for not embracing it but I’m so scared of never finding someone who won’t mind the fact that I’ll probably never have sex. I’m seeing all my friends in great relationships going on long travels and some moving in together and I want that so badly, but I’ve yet to find a guy who doesn’t disappear shortly after I come out to them. I miss the closeness of relationships and even love cuddling but I’m scared to even try anymore.

Hey, it is okay to not be completely comfortable with your sexuality. Evan Edinger has a really good vid about this. 

It is possible for you to have a loving relationship without having sex and you deserve that!! There are ace people out there, allosexuals who are celibate, as well as allosexuals who are willing to not have sex in a relationship.

There are also dating sites/apps for ace people (some are for celibate people who may not necessarily be ace) if you are open to online dating:

-OkCupid has an asexual option 

-ACEapp (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=xyz.purush.ace)

https://www.asexualcupid.com/

-Acebook (http://www.ace-book.net/)

-Asexualistic (http://www.asexualitic.com/)

-CelibatePassions (http://celibatepassions.com/)

I hope this helps

i’ve been questioning if i’m asexual lately, but i’m not sure if its just because i’m afraid of giving birth or that i have a negative body image that makes me think that i don’t like sex. i’m also only 14 so idk if it’s maybe just because i’m too young to find sex appealing. i’ve never felt sexual attraction towards anybody and i don’t see myself ever having sex.

Hey! If you think you are ace, that is valid despite what age you are. I was around your age when I realised I was asexual and I still am! But additionally its okay to identify as ace now and to not later. Sexuality can be fluid for some people over their lifetime, and that is just as valid as knowing at a young age or finding out later on!!

Hope this helps

So me and a few of my friends are actually ace, but we get made fun of quite a bit for it. On top of it, I haven’t come out to my parents yet, and while they’re relatively open people, I don’t exactly know how they’ll take it. So what should I do in both circumstances?

I’m so sorry that you and your friends experience that. But it is super awesome that you have ace friends!! I think the main ways are either to try and explain to people what asexuality is. The thing about this is that you shouldn’t have to, explaining your existence can be a lot emotional labour and certain people are not open to understand that not everyone experiences sexual attraction because of how it challenged their preconceived ideas on sex and relationships. You can also ignore them and surround yourself with supportive and affirming people. This however won’t make them stop and I’m sorry its something you have to deal with.

When it comes to coming out to your parents, I hold the belief that you shouldn’t come out if you believe it will be create a harmful and hostile environment because the most important thing is your safety. Your parents you said seem like open people so I would first test the waters by mentioning asexuality in passing, for example, ‘like oh I read this article about this thing asexuality, what do you think about it’. This way you can tell how they feel about it and how flexible their views are. Even if they are comfortable with the concept they may struggle for a while when you come out because their perception of you will have shifted. You do not have to come out, and there is no obligation to come out to everyone. You should only come out to your parents if feel  you are comfortable enough to and want to. Good luck with it if you do!!

Hope this helps

I’m ace and repulsed to the touch of other people, but I find joy in pleasuring myself. is that weird?

No that’s totally fine, asexuality is about not experiencing sexual attraction. Arousal is a physiological response and if you want to act on that response, that doesn’t make you any less ace!!

asexual-society: So @doctordonnadances is doing an MSc at the University of Aberdeen and their…

asexual-society:

So @doctordonnadances is doing an MSc at the University of Aberdeen and their thesis is on examining the role of social support in determining resilience in LGBA+ populations, trying to see if it might be an effective target area for intervention and increasing resilience, with a focus on sexual orientations. 

If you are comfortable doing so it would be really great if you could help them out by filling in their questionnaire.

Here’s the link: http://viis.abdn.ac.uk/snapwebhost/s.asp?k=149907523291

Thanks pals 

I was wondering, is sexual attraction something physical or psychological?I sometimes catch my body having certain reactions to when I see something sexual (or uhm “genital related”) but when I think about acting stuff out with a person I feel… repulsed.Maybe not the best example but,I am temporarily sharing a room with a male friend and he was like “so if you’re ace you should not be bothered by me walking around only in a slip.”But I feels kind of embarrassing?Sry if none of this makes sense

Hi, 

It totally makes sense, arousal is a physiological response, so you can experience no sexual attraction but still feel arousal and also be sex repulsed. The only qualifier to being asexual is not experiencing sexual attraction.

There is a really good definition of sexual attraction from this AVEN forum (Source)

Sexual attraction – Seeing someone and not only finding them attractive, but thinking you’d like to have sex with them, like fantasies and such. It’s attraction to another person that at it’s end wants to be physically intimate, as opposed to being attracted to someone in a way where you think, “I’d like to get to know them” or “I want to be their best friend” or “I want to be close to that person”.

Sexual desire – The desire to actually follow through with sexual attraction. I don’t consider physiological reactions to be part of sexual desire, really, because in my case I know my body responds to sexual stimulus, the difference is that my mind isn’t interested. So sexual desire is another mental thing, wanting actively to perform sexual acts with another person and believing that if you do you will feel gratified.

I hope this helps

So @doctordonnadances is doing an MSc at the University of Aberdeen and their thesis is on examining…

So @doctordonnadances is doing an MSc at the University of Aberdeen and their thesis is on examining the role of social support in determining resilience in LGBA+ populations, trying to see if it might be an effective target area for intervention and increasing resilience, with a focus on sexual orientations. 

If you are comfortable doing so it would be really great if you could help them out by filling in their questionnaire.

Here’s the link: http://viis.abdn.ac.uk/snapwebhost/s.asp?k=149907523291

Thanks pals 

You know Pride?? Do you… Do you think/know if there are ace meetups organised at Pride? I’ve never been to or checked out to see if asexual meetups exist, and I’ve never been to Pride… Though I’m going to Manchester’s in August (here’s hoping we don’t all get bombed again:S)… I’d love to meet some people like myself. I feel so lonely and broken.

Hey I’m really sorry you feel this way!! 

If you’re at university, I would message your LGBT+ society/grouo to see if there is anyone else 

AVEN probably have an group specifically for people in Manchester

https://asexualgroups.wordpress.com/ – is a directory of ace facebook groups and there are a couple for the UK, and you could write a message to find other asexuals in Manchester

https://www.meetup.com/topics/asexuality/ – a site for meetups, and this is the asexuality tag, they have a couple of meetups in the UK

fuckyeahasexual discord server – there are different groups in there and you can write a message to find Manchester based asexuals 

Also if anyone else lives in Machester and wants to go to Pride, write a message in the notes (I remember we had another ask from an asexual in Manchester)

Hope this helps!!